Mr. T Facts!!!

[Kaos(KoP)]

The last fool that Mr. T pitied was consequently in a coma for 37 years. Doctors say he was one of the lucky ones.

There was only one time a man tried to pity Mr. T. The laughter which emitted from Mr. T was so great it ended up creating the continent now know as Australia.

Jail was not invented to keep people safe from criminals but to keep criminals safe from Mr. T

God believes in Mr. T.

"Audacious gold chains - $300,000
Solid gold frohawk(r) comb - $11,000
Menacing steel toe capped stomping boots - $175

The look on Chuck Norris' face when he gets pitied...
Priceless."

Mr. T. has defecated only once. The result is now known as the Alps.

Mr. T once received a phone call during dinner asking him to change his long distance service. Mr. T was so angry at having his dinner interrupted that he reached through the phone and killed the man on the other end. This gave birth to the slogan, "Reach out and touch someone."

Mr. T drinks milk, doesn't do drugs, eats vegetables, and studies regularly. If you attempt to do all of these, Mr. T will pity you less. If you think that doing these things will turn you into Mr. T, you won't survive the night.

Mr. T is behind you right now. You just can't see him.

Mr. T always drives on the right side of the road, no matter where he is in the world.

Mr. T is the reason why Rocky is half retarded in Rocky V, not multiple blows to his head. After Rocky III Mr. T tried a new pity technique called PoT (Pity over Time). It inflicts a steady amount of pity which effects the brain on a daily basis. By the time Rocky VI is out Rocky will have Downs Syndrome and be amused by shiny things.

Before P-Diddy there was Puff-Daddy. Before Mr.T there was Mr.Tea Bag. "I pity the fool who's face gets crushed by my giant chocolate balls", didn't go over well with the network executives.

Mr. T once commented on the A-Team's shooting: "I pity the foo with our aim." And then promptly shot all exsisting cast members.


Mr. T feels neither heat nor cold. Heat and cold feel Mr. T.

Any password can be overridden by typing in 'mr_t'. Misspelling this in any way will result in a Pity Surge, which makes all nearby electronic equipment to explode.

Mr. T is the reason your son is black.

Despite popular belief, Mr. T is in fact Luke's father.

After a late night of drinking with his pals, Vin Diesel and Chuck Norris, Mr. T felt that the eagle on back of the U.S. quaters were giving him too much jibba jabba. Mr. T proceeded to pity George Washington for the incident. The eagle hasn't been seen since.

Behind every great man, there is a great woman. Behind that woman is Mr. T.

Mr. T has actually recorded three confirmed kills by using nothing more than the feather hanging from his ear.

Mr. T has a gold chain for every bone in Dick Ebersol's body he broke until "The A-Team" was greenlighted.

Mr. T is the reason the aliens haven't invaded.

Mr. T's gold jewelry is actually an intricate system of solar panels that power his central nervous system. Without them he would be unable to pity.

Mr. T was nearly drawn into a radical Islamic cult but he refused to join once he heard that he would have to settle for only 72 virgins.

Mr. T holds the trademark for "iPity", and refuses to sell it to Apple.

[Black_Mist(KoP)]

Mr T pities the fool that thinks Chuck is harder!!!!


23: That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.

Mr. T survived a roundhouse kick to the face from Chuck Norris. He was the first and only one to do so.

Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through doors.

Every time Mr. T pities the fool, a p0rnstar regains her virginity. Then proceeds to lose it to Mr. T.

The last time Mr. T went to McDonald's, Ronald McDonald greeted him. What occurred next proved to be the most violent beating of a clown ever recorded in human history.

Mr. T's hair style is actually a complex array of antennas that can triangulate the exact location of any fool in the universe. His gold chains can then transmit pity to those coordinates.

Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody is around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T is still able to pity him.

The Manhattan Project really did not create the atom bomb, but instead put Mr. T's pity in a bottle and then dropped it on Japan.

Mr. T's incredible greatness has been attributed to the fact that his genetic code doesn't have any A, G, or C. His genetic code is in fact, nothing but T's.

Originally the A-Team was named T-Team and consisted of Mr. T and six of his genetically engineered clones driving around in a van made of pure gold. Producers changed the format after every criminal known to man was killed in the pilot episode.

Mr. T made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to prove that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.

When Dr. Bruce Banner gets angry, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets angry, he turns into Mr. T.

Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always predicting pain.

If you were ever foolish enough to get into a fight with Mr. T, there would only be two hits: Mr. T hitting you, and you hitting the surface of the Sun.

The vegetarian group PETA one time tried to establish the catchphrase "We PETA the fool who eats animals." Upon learning of this blatant theft of his catch phrase, Mr. T founded McDonalds.

When Mr. T cuts onions, it's the onions doing the crying.

Mr. T's GMC van does not travel on solid surfaces, but instead mathematical planes. In other words, it can go wherever the hell Mr. T wants.

Mr. T was once clocked at 100 fps. That's 100 fools pitied a second.

Mr. T once got into a fight with a ninja. He killed the ninja, but only after the ninja had cut off two of his fingers. Those fingers grew up to be Gary Coleman and Webster.

Remember, only you can prevent forest fires. But also remember that you can't do ****, because Mr. T is the one who starts them, and no one can stop that crazy fool.

Mr. T can count past infinity.

When Mr. T has nightmares, people around him start dying for no reason.